getting ready

As the beginning of the school year rapidly approaches, I am beginning to get myself ready to make the transition from stay at home mommy, to "bringing home the bacon." Today I spoke with Cody's school about bringing Emma in for a trial run. My plan is to drop her off for 2 hours tomorrow, just see how she does. (Really to see how I handle it.) They are excited. I am hesitant. I trust them completely; Cody's been there for 3 years and loves all of his teachers. In fact, he often feels sad when we won't take him to school on Saturday and Sunday - a sure sign of his affection. I am hesitant only because I know that I will have a hard time leaving her. I went through it with Cody, and now I am prepared to go through it again -but not really. Baby books and magazines are always talking about separation anxiety, but they are always referring to the baby. In my case, it is me who experiences this anxiety - I'm sure Emma will be fine. She'll be well taken care of, stimulated, and doted on. So, if you happen to see me in the next few weeks, and I look forlorn and generally heartbroken, just know that I'm OK - but not really.